The goal of this exercise is to give you experience at revising a workplace communication.

NOTE: The Checklist for Revising can be downloaded and/or printed for use with this exercise.

The Exercise

This exercise concerns revisions to the introduction to instructions for conducting a Black Cherry knot survey. The instructions will be included in a lab book for a horticulture class.

Below you will find the original introduction followed by a revision.

As the first step in this exercise, compare original and revised drafts to identify the changes the writer made when revising. Explain the reasons for believing that each change does or does not improve the introduction.

As the second step in this exercise, revise the revision to improve the introduction significantly. Be prepared to explain the reasons for the changes you make.

The Original Document

Black cherry is a very valuable source of lumber for foresters. But it is sometimes infected with black knot. Black knot is a fungus which affects the tree by forming large galls on the branches and trunks. The fungal spores are formed during the wet weather in the spring. Once the galls begin to grow they grow thicker and elongate, eventually cutting off the flow of nutrients above the galls.

From this set of instructions you will be led step-by-step through the procedure for randomly tagging black cherry which are infected by the fungus in an area of clear-cut in State forest land. It should be noted that the instructions are written for an entry-level forester. The procedure will take about one hour per fifty feet of the study.

You should know how to identify trees of this state to the species level and how to use a compass and how to identify black knot. You will need tags and fasteners, data sheets to record information, a compass, and a tape measure.

The First Revision

Although black cherry is a very valuable source of lumber for foresters, it is sometimes infected with black knot. Black knot is a fungus which affects the tree by forming large galls on the branches and trunks. The fungal spores are formed during the wet weather in the spring. Once the galls begin to grow they grow thicker and elongate, eventually cutting off the flow of nutrients above the galls.

This set of instructions will lead you step-by-step through the procedure for randomly tagging black cherry which are infected by the fungus in an area of clear-cut in State forest land. These instructions are written for an entry-level forester. The procedure will take about one hour per fifty feet of the study.

You should know how 1) to identify trees of this state to the species level, 2) to use a compass, and 3) to identify black knot. You will need tags and fasteners, data sheets to record information, a compass, and a tape measure.